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feeling small

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for most of my life i've struggled with feeling small. small in the sense that i'm insignificant, weak, vulnerable. a lot of anxiety stems from others having the ability to take advantage of me, but then i take advantage of myself. i feel small when i think of college and careers and all the majors i have to sift through to find one that clicks with my morals and lifestyle. i never give myself a break, i do the best that i can and yet i tell myself it's not enough. i'm so anxious that i'll never find a job that supports me, my ambitions and my future dogs. in a family of doctors and a school of driven individuals, it seems like medical school is the only right path and yet it feels so wrong. it feels wrong to work for such a huge life commitment when i'm not committed in the slightest. when i abandoned the idea of following in my moms footsteps i felt small and without direction. everything i had worked for up to that point, every class and medical workshop
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behind the photo: faceless fisherman

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this is a photo i took and in the photo is a man i've never met, i actually never even saw his face. what's his name? how did he get there? what makes him smile? what's his favorite color? his story can be found in a blank hard covered book filled with thousands of even whiter pages- one for every day of his life. i can only imagine who this man really is and dream up the words, but it'd only be true to me. i like taking pictures of strangers because it can tell me a lot about myself. so instead of narrating this man's life and pretending that he and i will ever share a connection beyond this picture, i will tell you a little about what this photo tells of me.   i'd say even a year ago, this photo would've made me mad. honestly i wouldn't have even taken it at the time. i've been vegan for very very close to two years now and at the beginning it was so hard for me to understand how people could-well, not be vegan. in the midst of my new lifest
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the end of a day

we stare into the sky, silence surrounding the painted hues. you glance at me with sunken eyes and a broken smile, sunsets or sunrises? sunsets. because even though a sunrise reminds that we’re alive, a sunset screams that we’ve made it; and that’s always the hardest part .
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behind the name

deciding what to make my first post on seemed kind of daunting.  it's the first so there's no guarantee anyone will read it on it's own, some may find it months down the line after coming across a later post.  i wanted to make it relevant to anyone reading at any time.  then it became clear to me that the reasons behind this site will always be relevant so long as i'm still using it and people are still reading it.  so, why "where all the wildflowers are"?  it all starts in a car. road trips can be fun to an extent and that extent truly depends on who you are with, what you're listening to or what you're doing.  but no matter how great the company or how good the book, hours and hours in the car can be draining and you feel as if the only way not to explode is to get out and move around or at least get your mouth moving by eating salty road trip snacks.  for me, finding the wildflower patches along the interstate made the drive worth it.  sometimes t
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